The other day I saw an advert for a sausage company called Johnsonville. Their slogan? “Sausage is all we do”.
Blimey, I thought: that’s bloody brilliant.
So I sent them an email.
Hello my name is Bobbie Johnson. I love sausages of all descriptions: big ones, small ones, brats, links, smoked, you name it, I’ll eat it.
And since my name is Johnson too, I feel an affinity with your company that I would like to display publicly through the medium of a T-shirt.
My dream scenario is that you have a stockpile of tees with your logo and slogan on: “JOHNSONVILLE: SAUSAGE IS ALL WE DO.”
Can you fulfil my dream? You would win a fan for life, and have your fine products advertised wherever I go.
I thought little of it until we returned from a few days away, and I noticed a mysterious envelope in our pile of post (note the Johnsonville logo in the top left).
How exciting!
I opened the envelope, and discovered a card - embossed, no less, with the Johnsonville seal.
I was on tenterhooks.
The anticipation.
The sweet
anticipation
and then…
I opened it up to find a canned message and two $1 off coupons for Johnsonville sausages.
How disappointing. My dreams of a sausage-related T-shirt dashed in seconds.
I may never recover.
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Manchester state beach, Mendocino County, CA
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Senior figures call for Obama to name chief technology officer
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